You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I want a musical about memes.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
