FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
