At least make sure they are 18
Why
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
