So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
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