There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
