Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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