oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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