47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
