Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
How external is "for external use only"?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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