He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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