he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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