Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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