His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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