we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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