i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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