ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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