I'm gonna have a badass scar
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
