And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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