I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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