i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
