this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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