you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
it's great music for shaving your balls
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
