How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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