my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Randomize
