Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
