why didn't you poke me back
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
you never un-have a 4some
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
