I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
