I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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