Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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