hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Randomize