i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize