I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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