you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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