Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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