Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
