Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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