did you get engaged???
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Randomize
