just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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