i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I haven't been this sober since birth.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
