gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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