So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
We talked him into tasing himself.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
