so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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