Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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