The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
