i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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