Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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