someone get that fucking seahorse.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
