The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
false alarm, still single
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
