I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
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