cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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